(a lone figure walks up to the podium in a smoky room filed with people)<\/p>\n
"Hi, I’m DmentD."<\/p>\n
(the crowd speaks as one)<\/p>\n
"Hi DmentD!<\/i>"<\/p>\n
"I’m an internetaholic. I have been for so long that time is a blur. I can’t even tell you when or how it started. I’m a hopeless lost cause. You see, I didn’t come here for redemption, reform or rehabilitation. No my brothers and sisters, I came here to reaffirm my addiction – to bask in it’s soft radioactive glow."<\/p>\n
"I love the web with all it’s useful<\/b><\/a> and useless<\/b><\/a> information. I relish the fact that I can shop from home<\/b><\/a>, while away the hours<\/b><\/a> then turn around and push a big red button<\/b><\/a> that does absolutely nothing. Ahhh, bliss."<\/p>\n "Email is another great form of entertainment too. I can keep up with my friends, write stinging commentaries to my congressman and learn how to enlarge my penis – just like John Holmes<\/b><\/a>. Spam is the greatest sometimes. Have any of you actually read<\/i> some of the stupidity that hits your inbox? It’s hilarious."<\/p>\n "I live for filesharing – well, partaking from people who share files anyway. There are one<\/b><\/a> or two<\/b><\/a> really good P2P programs out there that make my life complete. I just can’t get enough of my favorite animated shows<\/b><\/a>, TV series<\/b><\/a> and old martial arts<\/b><\/a> movies. I can collect them to watch at my leisure and trade with my friends. I won’t go into the whole music side of it."<\/p>\n "I’ve only just scratched the surface, my friends. You should give up this folly of giving it up and join me in my pride."<\/p>\n (someone approaches the podium from the darkness of the room)<\/p>\n "Gonzo, what are you doing here?"<\/p>\n "Uh, Stuff, when we say that this is an internetaholic support group, we meant that we’re helping each other to use the internet more frequently and efficiently."<\/p>\n "Ah, I see. So I don’t have to hand out these porn-site password leaflets then – you know, as an incentive to fall off the wagon?"<\/p>\n "What? Are you on crack? Of course<\/b><\/i> you have to. Do you forget your audience? We’ll just call them… door-prizes."<\/p>\n "Solidarity, my brother."<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" (a lone figure walks up to the podium in a smoky room filed with people) "Hi, I’m DmentD." (the crowd speaks as one) "Hi DmentD!" "I’m an internetaholic. I have been for so long that time is a blur. I can’t even tell you when or how it started. I’m a hopeless lost cause. You […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"recipes.php","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-22","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dmentd.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dmentd.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dmentd.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dmentd.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dmentd.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=22"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/dmentd.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/22\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dmentd.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=22"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dmentd.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=22"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dmentd.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=22"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}